Member-only story
desperation will be the death of me
I’ve been overtly stressed these past few days. I am so desperately trying to make ends meet. Whether it be with my sanity, financials, career-wise, etc.
Nothing seems to work. Even at this moment, I am hanging on by a mere thread. I think I’m starting to lose it. I’m typing and typing away…and for what?
To wake up tomorrow and commit to the same task. The same morning under the same sun as the day before.
I feel that I’m losing it. I wish to rid of these feelings and I just wanted to get it out there. I’m typing this now to bring out any semblance of catharsis.
God, I’m so desperate right now. Please. Anything would suffice. I’m just begging for a new day with different results. On the positive side preferably.
And I hate that I need to say that or else I’ll be met with an unfavorable superstition, worsening my state of being.
It really could just be this economy and capitalism. I’ve fallen to the mercy of the rat race I tried so much to avoid. A victim in my tax bracket and a slave by circumstance. This is not the life I envisioned.
The most embarrassing existence on Earth.
AHHH. I just want to be reassured that my days won’t always be like this.
But as always, I will persist, hoping for a new day.
